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How do you get more clients without being too “salesy”?
Leadership coach Tracey Gee tells us that personal development books marketed to women are shelved in the self-help section but books on similar topics marketed to men are in the leadership section.
This sobering observation speaks to a reality felt by the majority of women in business. We are conditioned by society to think of self-promotion as boastful or annoying, rather than seeing it for what it is - the only real way to drive impact & add value to your current and potential clients.
We can frame this dilemma as Rules, Cheats, & Rebels. Establish a rule. Then, show us somebody breaking it. NOW, you’ve got our attention. Will they be punished? Or will they be vindicated?
What do Eve, Pandora, and Peter Rabbit all have in common? They’ve all been given a set of rules… from which they have all deviated. That’s where things get interesting. We all live by rules, so we pay very close attention to stories about anyone who breaks them.
Let's round up some of the rules (and lies) told to us as women in business:
- Don't bother somebody.
- Don't take time away from somebody's busy life.
- Don't draw attention to yourself.
- Don't take up space.
- Don't have too strong of an opinion.
- What you have to say is not important.
- Be kind by being soft, gentle, and accommodating.
Who is the hero in your story? Who is the rule-breaker? Could it be you - the innovator - breaking unwritten rules in order to do well in business? In our case, the hero (again, that’s YOU) is a rebel who must act selflessly at cost to their personal comfort. You must break societal rules in the pursuit of a higher rule - our common goal of positively impacting the horse world.
The fact of the matter is, for most of us, the standards set forth for us by the unwritten rules of society are not how we behave in our relationships with horses. Why, then, do we feel the need to make ourselves small in business? The truth is: the biggest favor we can do for someone is provide them the incredible service we offer with expertise and ease.
Can we make the hero somebody who reinvents the game based on the way they are with horses?
When your horse gets spooked by a tarp flying off in the distance, you know that's not on you. As a professional, you've learned to manage that pressure and stay very calm while your horse escalates. When another person gets triggered, we very often see it as our fault - that WE are the cause of their trigger. Therefore something must be wrong with us. This can often lead us to shy away from speaking our authentic truth.
But this ability to stand your ground and calmly stay in your power - neither pushing nor being shoved - can easily be translated and used when promoting yourself. IF someone becomes triggered by something you've said while representing yourself and your business, know that this is entirely an issue within that person.
The act of self-promotion (as it is portrayed to us) can feel very counter-feminine. In reality, we are not trying to emulate a masculine way of doing things. Women do tend to be more collaborative and more herd oriented. This can often cause us to shy away from self-promotion for fear of being rejected or perceived as boastful.
We have a primal fear of not being accepted by the herd. As horse trainers, equine practitioners, barn owners & equine-facilitated therapists, we tend to feel so accepted within a herd of horses because we know how to navigate them. Those same skills that allow us to effectively navigate the horse herd could allow us to navigate the human herd. The only difference is our fear and interpretation. We see the physical rebuttal of a horse as immediate feedback that something didn't work. However, a human verbal disapproval is often registered as much more aggressive.
As we navigate this, it's our job to dismantle the assumption that "not being rejected" is better than putting yourself front and center. No matter the outcome, it's all just feedback. Horses that aren't accepted into the herd, don't change who they are. It's not that personal. They simply go and find a new one. Making yourself visible by marketing yourself is the only way to truly find your people and your community.
One of the biggest lies your imposter syndrome tells you is that you need to have a linear journey in your horse business in order to truly be "authentic." Particularly, as women in business, we tend to feel added pressure to be perfectly qualified at every step of the way - rather than acknowledging the depth of experience we have and the ways in which that uniquely qualifies us.In fact, your real and raw horse career is what aligns with your ideal client the most. The fact that you've been through it and faced similar challenges to them appeals to clients in a way that is personal and can't be replicated.
Three of the best ways to get more clients without being “salesy” are:
Your website
Emails
Facebook profiles/web traffic
But in order to fully seize these opportunities (and generate the organic result we’d like), there’s one more “rule” we have to break. It's time to stop thinking of yourself as "annoying" for sending that email, posting that post or talking about what you do. For your ideal client, this is EXACTLY what they've been searching for. The service you provide is the answer to their prayers. A Forbes study estimates that 75% of women have experienced feelings of being an impostor at some stage in their careers. You're not alone! But this imposter syndrome is standing in the way of what you want. And if you won't do it for yourself, know that your imposter syndrome is also standing in the way of your client receiving the vital service you provide to the horse community.
So - now that we know it is our job to be the Hero/Rebel of our story - let’s check back in with our “Rules,” shall we:
- Don't bother somebody.
Your marketing is NOT a bother! Your email is not JUNK!
- Don't take time away from somebody's busy life.
Offering your skill and passion for horses will SAVE your clients time.
- Don't draw attention to yourself.
You are the answer to your clients PRAYERS. Don’t deprive them of that!
- Don't take up space.
You MUST.
- Don't have too strong of an opinion.
You are an expert in your field!
- What you have to say is not important.
The service you provide in your horse business is proven and necessary.
- Be kind by being soft, gentle, and accommodating.
You see where we’re headed with this by now!!!!
Much like you have to earn the trust of your horse through time and continued bonding experiences, the same can be said for your relationships with potential clients. The cure to being “salesy” is simple… AUTHENTICITY. Your readers and potential clients - like your horses - are SMART. They can sense the difference between authentic outreach and superficial connection. Knowing the value of your business and speaking to it from the heart can be all the difference between coming across inauthentic and sales-y vs. value driven and trustworthy.
How do you get more clients without being too “salesy”?
Leadership coach Tracey Gee tells us that personal development books marketed to women are shelved in the self-help section but books on similar topics marketed to men are in the leadership section.
This sobering observation speaks to a reality felt by the majority of women in business. We are conditioned by society to think of self-promotion as boastful or annoying, rather than seeing it for what it is - the only real way to drive impact & add value to your current and potential clients.
We can frame this dilemma as Rules, Cheats, & Rebels. Establish a rule. Then, show us somebody breaking it. NOW, you’ve got our attention. Will they be punished? Or will they be vindicated?
What do Eve, Pandora, and Peter Rabbit all have in common? They’ve all been given a set of rules… from which they have all deviated. That’s where things get interesting. We all live by rules, so we pay very close attention to stories about anyone who breaks them.
Let's round up some of the rules (and lies) told to us as women in business:
- Don't bother somebody.
- Don't take time away from somebody's busy life.
- Don't draw attention to yourself.
- Don't take up space.
- Don't have too strong of an opinion.
- What you have to say is not important.
- Be kind by being soft, gentle, and accommodating.
Who is the hero in your story? Who is the rule-breaker? Could it be you - the innovator - breaking unwritten rules in order to do well in business? In our case, the hero (again, that’s YOU) is a rebel who must act selflessly at cost to their personal comfort. You must break societal rules in the pursuit of a higher rule - our common goal of positively impacting the horse world.
The fact of the matter is, for most of us, the standards set forth for us by the unwritten rules of society are not how we behave in our relationships with horses. Why, then, do we feel the need to make ourselves small in business? The truth is: the biggest favor we can do for someone is provide them the incredible service we offer with expertise and ease.
Can we make the hero somebody who reinvents the game based on the way they are with horses?
When your horse gets spooked by a tarp flying off in the distance, you know that's not on you. As a professional, you've learned to manage that pressure and stay very calm while your horse escalates. When another person gets triggered, we very often see it as our fault - that WE are the cause of their trigger. Therefore something must be wrong with us. This can often lead us to shy away from speaking our authentic truth.
But this ability to stand your ground and calmly stay in your power - neither pushing nor being shoved - can easily be translated and used when promoting yourself. IF someone becomes triggered by something you've said while representing yourself and your business, know that this is entirely an issue within that person.
The act of self-promotion (as it is portrayed to us) can feel very counter-feminine. In reality, we are not trying to emulate a masculine way of doing things. Women do tend to be more collaborative and more herd oriented. This can often cause us to shy away from self-promotion for fear of being rejected or perceived as boastful.
We have a primal fear of not being accepted by the herd. As horse trainers, equine practitioners, barn owners & equine-facilitated therapists, we tend to feel so accepted within a herd of horses because we know how to navigate them. Those same skills that allow us to effectively navigate the horse herd could allow us to navigate the human herd. The only difference is our fear and interpretation. We see the physical rebuttal of a horse as immediate feedback that something didn't work. However, a human verbal disapproval is often registered as much more aggressive.
As we navigate this, it's our job to dismantle the assumption that "not being rejected" is better than putting yourself front and center. No matter the outcome, it's all just feedback. Horses that aren't accepted into the herd, don't change who they are. It's not that personal. They simply go and find a new one. Making yourself visible by marketing yourself is the only way to truly find your people and your community.
One of the biggest lies your imposter syndrome tells you is that you need to have a linear journey in your horse business in order to truly be "authentic." Particularly, as women in business, we tend to feel added pressure to be perfectly qualified at every step of the way - rather than acknowledging the depth of experience we have and the ways in which that uniquely qualifies us.In fact, your real and raw horse career is what aligns with your ideal client the most. The fact that you've been through it and faced similar challenges to them appeals to clients in a way that is personal and can't be replicated.
Three of the best ways to get more clients without being “salesy” are:
Your website
Emails
Facebook profiles/web traffic
But in order to fully seize these opportunities (and generate the organic result we’d like), there’s one more “rule” we have to break. It's time to stop thinking of yourself as "annoying" for sending that email, posting that post or talking about what you do. For your ideal client, this is EXACTLY what they've been searching for. The service you provide is the answer to their prayers. A Forbes study estimates that 75% of women have experienced feelings of being an impostor at some stage in their careers. You're not alone! But this imposter syndrome is standing in the way of what you want. And if you won't do it for yourself, know that your imposter syndrome is also standing in the way of your client receiving the vital service you provide to the horse community.
So - now that we know it is our job to be the Hero/Rebel of our story - let’s check back in with our “Rules,” shall we:
- Don't bother somebody.
Your marketing is NOT a bother! Your email is not JUNK!
- Don't take time away from somebody's busy life.
Offering your skill and passion for horses will SAVE your clients time.
- Don't draw attention to yourself.
You are the answer to your clients PRAYERS. Don’t deprive them of that!
- Don't take up space.
You MUST.
- Don't have too strong of an opinion.
You are an expert in your field!
- What you have to say is not important.
The service you provide in your horse business is proven and necessary.
- Be kind by being soft, gentle, and accommodating.
You see where we’re headed with this by now!!!!
Much like you have to earn the trust of your horse through time and continued bonding experiences, the same can be said for your relationships with potential clients. The cure to being “salesy” is simple… AUTHENTICITY. Your readers and potential clients - like your horses - are SMART. They can sense the difference between authentic outreach and superficial connection. Knowing the value of your business and speaking to it from the heart can be all the difference between coming across inauthentic and sales-y vs. value driven and trustworthy.
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